Hello Kenneth,

You asked about people who die in infancy. They have no opportunity to mature in the physical realm so they can grow emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually and set sail on their journey toward spiritual maturity.

Let me say first that no one really knows the answers to these issues. We all are basing what we believe on intuition that has some basis in personal experience and factual knowledge; some of it is also based on a collection of traditions that grow within a belief system, including religious, scientific, and spiritual or New Agey. But no one really knows.

These are my beliefs. At birth, the infant has no identity. It is a tabula rasa, a blank slate. It doesn't see a physical difference between it and its mother and surrounding world; it knows no emotional or personal distinction. It simply exists, and as such starts out no different from an infant squirrel or bear cub.

The infant then learns how to survive in the physical realm. It learns that its toes are separate from its mouth by touching and sucking on them. Then it realizes its body has different parts. Then it learns it is physically different from the mother. That takes place in the first ten months or so. In the second through third years, it learns it has other differences. It tries them out on the world in the terrible 2's. These periods of growth help the person feel individuation (separateness) while still maintaining wholeness (togetherness). Tension results from the growth; the tension creates more growth; and the growth gradually creates an individual.

The child through 13 or 14 is answering the question, "Who am I?" As such, he or she isn't capable of a religious or spiritual feeling as an adult defines it. Certainly, spiritual maturity as we're talking about it doesn't seem to come to people until later in life. They can't set sail until then.

So until the person is able to start reaching spiritual maturity, he or she is still simply a being in the physical realm, like squirrels and bear cubs.

And other things are solely part of the physical realm as well. Some human beings never advance mentally beyond the capacity of an infant or young child. Some are brain damaged later in life, or develop an affliction such as Alzheimer's, and lose the capacity to mature psychologically or spiritually. Some have chemical imbalances and genetic flaws that preclude them from becoming compassionate and loving.

This is all part of the material realm. The physical realm is the realm of beginnings and endings: deterioration, destruction, and death. It is ruthless. Instincts and self-preservation dominate. It is, in other words, much like the world the radical materialists imagine: cold, unfeeling, and lifeless.

What makes a difference is that consciousness outside of the physical realm is purely love and intelligence. When the physical realm is shut down, what is left is exactly the opposite of the physical realm; the spiritual realm is filled with warmth, caring, and compassion. And so, as the human being develops mentally, he or she begins to drop off the physical realm. The more that is dropped off, the more warm, caring, and compassionate the person becomes. That requires years of growth and maturation.

Every person starts out by focusing on the physical realm. That is a necessary part of development. The person who focuses on the material realm all of his or her life is, in essence, living the life of a being of the physical realm: an animal or a plant. And in that state, is subject to all of the coldness and death in the physical realm. People tend their nests to make them bigger and better in the physical realm, when the inevitable end is that they will deteriorate and die. Wealth will fall away or not save the person from illness and death. Businesses will eventually fail or the person will leave the business. Physical prowess or beauty will deteriorate. Everyone the person loves will die, and eventually he or she will die as well. Nothing in the physical realm will remain—it all dies.

But the same person able to focus on the physical realm is capable of growing to maturity in the spiritual. Dropping off the focus on the physical realm means the spiritual will permeate the person's psyche and life. When the physical realm is seen for what it is—temporary, cold, and distressing—the person loses his or her attachment to it and is able to open to the spiritual realm, permeated with bliss, happiness, and contentment.

Now, to the infant who dies. The infant has not had an opportunity to develop to spiritual maturity. Some suggest that the infant has a Higher Self that has chosen to come into the world and leave it before maturing. That may be true. We don't know. But an infant can't learn life lessons. I don't know what purpose that could serve. I think it is more likely that the physical realm continues in its cold, unfeeling, lifeless course, which simply includes some people not living to maturity, losing their capacity to continue to mature, or never having a capacity to mature, and it is simply part of the physical realm as being hit by a bus is.

However, I also believe that those who attain adulthood in the physical realm and grow into spiritual maturity have chosen to do so prior to their births to learn life lessons and enjoy the fruits of the physical realm. They will inevitably reach maturity in the physical realm and continue to grow spiritually; that is what they chose to happen and the physical realm is formed by the spiritual.

And I believe that all those we love in the physical realm continue to live after death because we love them. Everything and everyone we love is eternal because of our love. The unborn child we love didn't itself gain physical or spiritual maturity, but our love for it gives it eternal life. It will grow and mature and eventually itself gain spiritual maturity in some life because we love it. In induced after-death communications (IADCs) and after-death communications (ADCs), children, infants, and the unborn who have died but are loved by the experiencer commonly appear alive (in spirit) and to have matured as though they had continued to survive in the physical realm.

In other words, the great lesson we're learning from the hundreds of thousands and millions of reports of NDEs, ADCs, IADCs, and medium readings is that love is the underlying force of the cosmos; it is the author of consciousness; and our love creates and sustains us and those we love, even those who couldn't finish their growth in the physical realm.

When we as a species mature, we'll be able to understand that love is a force, like gravity and electromagnetic energy, but unlike the physical realm forces, it is the spiritual realm force. And since the spiritual or greater reality under girds the physical, love is at the basis of our being. All those we love live; we give them life eternal, and we will never be separated from them.

Love and peace, Craig